Personally, I define resilience as having a strong ability to bounce back when things don’t go the way you wanted. The more resilience you have, the better you are at coping with obstacles small or large.
I actually love this definition from Psychology Today:
“Resilience is that ineffable quality that allows some people to be knocked down by life and come back stronger than ever. Rather than letting failure overcome them and drain their resolve, they find a way to rise from the ashes.”
Contents
Resilience can be built – So what can you do to strengthen yours?
1. Don’t minimize your emotions and thoughts
What you’re feeling is valid and repressing thoughts and emotions won’t help you. Being resilient does not mean being a robot!
Resilient people still experience, stress, sadness and other negative emotions. However, they understand that these emotions don’t define their situation. Accept the way you feel but don’t let these feelings stop you from taking these next steps.
2. Re-frame the way that you approach situations
I believe that this is one of the most crucial factors when it comes to resilience. Facing obstacles with a problem-solving mindset is the most positive thing you can do to build your resilience.
Approach challenges and say: “Ok, what’s the next step? How can I work around this obstacle?” Don’t focus on the problem, focus on finding a solution.
I bet we’ve all worked in teams where there is someone who constantly points out problems but never offers positive solutions – don’t be that person!
If you can’t change or move the obstacle, find a way to adapt or go around it!
3. Find your tribe and ask for help
Our CEO – Mary talks about this in this Forbes article. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. None of us has all the answers!
Whether it’s an online community, a mentor, a networking group or understanding friends, having a support network is crucial!
4. Be proactive
Don’t wait for the situation to fix itself or try to avoid it – no matter how much you don’t want to face it.
This goes back to having a problem-solving mindset. Often out of fear of failing, we try to avoid dealing with situations where we have to overcome an obstacle.
Resilient people tend to take action. It can start small. For example, reach out to an online community and ask them for help dealing with your problem. Or set aside some time to brainstorm next steps.
Don’t allow yourself to get stuck in fear. Which leads me onto my next point…
5. Say yes to things that scare you – small or big!
A few months ago, I decided to overcome my fear of singing in public by taking a musical improv class. More recently, I spent a weekend learning to bake sourdough bread. While I love food I have a slight (probably unusual) phobia of baking and cooking….
Why did I do these things?
I want to challenge myself and get the feeling that comes with knowing I’ve overcome fears and things I find difficult.
The more you take on these kinds of challenges, the more you build your resilience. You’re putting memories, feelings and associations with facing obstacles in the bank.
You’re getting your brain used to being challenged and used to overcoming difficulties.
What scares you? What obstacles do you want to overcome?
Have you listened to our latest podcast episode? Our CEO – Mary Baird-Wilcock, CSEP helps you simplify in life and in business.